March 26, 2014
THE INTERVIEW (A Satire)
American: "Mr. President, I am most grateful that you have granted the opportunity for just a normal American like me, the chance to ask you some questions that linger in the minds of millions of Americans relevant to your first five years as our president. My first question is, how do you and Mrs. Obama feel about occupying the People's House?"
Obama: "I'm glad to do the interview Mr. American and I'll keep my answers brief and to the point. Mrs. Obama and I have taken full advantage of the perks offered by this office and this grand home and we have enjoyed the use of Air Force One and Two for our vacations and all the pomp, circumstance and glamour that comes with being President. But regards to this interview with you Mr. American, let me tell you of an interview I had with Bill O'Reilly. I thought I did a real good job in that interview in presenting the facts as I see them, in responding to Mr. O'Reilly's somewhat impertinent, irrelevant questions. Bill kept interrupting me, but I kept my cool and ....."
American: "Mr. President! ... Mr. President! .... Mr. President! ... I'm sorry to interrupt you but will you give me a moment so that I can ask my second question. Thank you Mr. President. My second question is related to your statements during the run up to the passage of the Affordable Care Act and your statements after it was passed by Congress. Do you consider the statements you made about the people being able to keep their health insurance plan and their doctor and that the insurance premiums going down as a result of the ACA were accurate then and accurate now?
Obama: Well now Mr. American, here is where you are getting into the realm of impertinent, irrelevant questions that I and my administration consider to be phony scandals. This is beginning to border on a Bill O'Reilly interview, not a normal American one and it questions the veracity of the Presidency. But let me try to answer your question the best way I can. Yes!"
American: "That's YES, that your statements were accurate?"
American: "Then Mr. President, you don't consider your statements to be outright lies and fabrications and that you and members of your administration and Democrat members of Congress made those statements to dupe the American people into buying off on your signature legislation that has been dubbed, Obama Care?"
Obama: "Now look here Mr. American, I have never lied in my entire life and I don't intend to sit here and be insulted, even if you are just a normal American. Keep this up and this interview is over. I've walked out on interviews by better men than you and I'll do it again if it becomes necessary. Now keep your questions to matters of relevancy to my Presidency."
American: "Mr. President, don't pull that crap with me. May I remind you that you occupy the People's House and that your tenure here is temporary. I have a right to ask these questions and you are honor bound to answer them with honesty, honor and distinction out of the respect of the high office you hold and out of respect of the American people whom you serve. My third question Sir is, where were you between the hours of 5:00 PM and the next morning on the night of September 11, 2012 when Christopher Stevens, our Ambassador to Libya was killed, along with three other brave Americans and what were you doing during those hours?"
Obama: "Mr. American, the subject of the attack on our consulate in Libya is under investigation by the Congress and several federal agencies and I can't comment on it at this time. However, I would like to tell you about my fund raising event in Las Vegas the next morning. I gave a speech on ....."
American: "Mr. President! ... Mr. President! .... Mr. President! ... I'm sorry to interrupt but there you go again, trying to change the subject. The people don't care about your Las Vegas fund raising event. They want to know what the Hell you were doing when all Hell was breaking loose and four Americans were tortured and brutally slaughtered by over one hundred well-armed Jihadists in an un-provoked attack on our consulate and our Ambassador to Libya. Why was our military not activated in an attempt to rescue them? Why was the Ambassador's multiple requests for more security at the consulate ignored by your Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton? Why did you send out Susan Rice four days later to lie that the cause of the attack resulted from some anti-Islamic video when you knew it was a terrorist attack? Why won't you answer my questions Mr. President?"
Obama: "No comment!"
American: "Well then Mr. President, maybe I can get you to answer this question for the American people. When it was exposed last May, you first condemned the practices of the IRS targeting conservative organizations seeking 501(c)4 tax exempt status and you promised that your administration would get to the bottom of it. Then you appointed one of your acolytes in the Justice Department that contributed a large sum of money to your campaign, to conduct the investigation. It was later leaked in the Wall Street Journal that no indictments would take place by the FBI. Both Houses of Congress are conducting their own investigations of the IRS, but the IRS is stonewalling those investigations. My question is Mr. President, why haven't you or your administration mandated that the IRS fully cooperate and comply with all of these investigations and release all of the requested documents?"
Obama: "Once again Mr. American, the subject of the IRS's impropriety is under investigation by the Congress and several federal agencies and I can't comment on it at this time. However, let me tell you of an experience I had in Reverend Wright's Trinity United Church of Christ of Chicago and when Reverend Wright ....."
American: "Mr. President! Your twenty years attending Reverend Wright's church has nothing to do with the IRS scandal that you now consider to be phony. And your association with the infamous, anti-American, anti-Semite Reverend Wright is quite possibly a scandal unto itself, which the Mainstream Media chose to ignore during your ascendancy to the American throne in 2008. That highly questionable relationship was conveniently ignored by the media during your 2012 campaign as well. The media seemed to be more interested in Harry Reid's blatant lie that Mitt Romney never paid any income taxes ..... from an anonymous source of course. So thank you Mr. President for not answering my question."
Obama: "No comment, except to say that there is not a smidgeon of corruption in the IRS, as I told Bill O'Reilly!"
American: "Really, Mr. President! Very well, since you won't answer my IRS question, perhaps I can get you to address this issue. Why do you believe that appeasement and negotiating with our enemies is an appropriate strategy by the most powerful nation on earth and why did you back down when Syria crossed over the red line you laid down over their use of chemical weapons and why did you let Vladimir Putin bluff you into allowing that Syrian thug Assad to remain in power?"
Obama: "Well, Mr. American, that's three questions, but let me start with the first. I take exception to your allegation that my foreign policy strategy is one of appeasement. My approach to foreign policy is one that recognizes the dignity of all nations and it is incumbent on America to recognize that dignity and act accordingly with meaningful negotiations ....."
American: "Hold on Mr. President, I must interrupt! You call what you have done or not done with regards to Syria, Libya, Iran, Israel, the Palestinians and now Russia as meaningful negotiations? They are all thumbing their noses in your face Mr. President, including Vladimir Putin. They are laughing at you. What has your meaningful negotiations done for America?"
Obama: "Now wait a minute Mr. American. You don't need to get huffy. After all, I am the President of the United States and you can't talk to me that way. We live in an international world and it is not right for America to be pushing its finger into every little geo-political situation with our economic power and military might. I know for a fact that world leaders think the world of me. I'm the best president that America has ever had and they know it. It's high time the American people recognized it too. They need to quit their bellyaching and buck up. It's just bad fortune that the Affordable Care Act has turned into a minor disaster and all the evidence points to the fact that the previous administration wrecked the ACA. Believe me, it will get better after I make another 20 tweaks to the law. These allegations that I lied about the provisions of the Act are just not true and you know it."
American: I know no such thing Mr. President. But I can see that we're not going to get anywhere with this line of questioning, so I'll try another one that is a little closer to home. Mr. President, why do you keep appointing radical ideologues to positions of power in your administration? Some of these guys you appoint are really off the wall."
Obama: "I resent that Mr. American. I appoint people of the highest caliber to these offices. It is just a coincidence that most of them have bundled money for my campaign. To infer that there is any impropriety here is down right insulting. Now if you continue with these types of irrelevant questions, I may have to break off this interview."
American: "Mr. President, I recognize and respect the office of president, but remember, you are the president of all the people. Essentially, you work for us and we can fire you at the ballot box or by impeachment. You are not King, or God. You are a mortal man. You have a solemn duty to preserve, protect and defend the individual liberties of the people and the Constitution and to faithfully discharge all of the laws of the United States, so help you God. What right or constitutional authority do you have as President of the United States to change a law after it has been duly passed by Congress?"
Obama: "Mr. American, my right and authority to change a law any time I want is a matter of history and convention. Many presidents have done so before me. FDR signed over 3,400 executive orders in his three terms and he changed the law with regularity. If he can do it, so can I. And further, the Congress has no stomach to challenge me anyway. They are a gutless lot."
American: "Mr. President. You have dodged, skated and skirted every question I have asked you, so I will wrap this interview up with one last question of vital importance to all the American people. You came to this office as a uniter, not a divider, at least that is what you said. So given your actions for these last five years, why should the American people trust you to faithfully discharge your duties as President of the United States when you have lied to them, berated them, misled them, insulted them and divided them?"
Obama: "Now you have done it Mr. American. You have attacked me and my administration for the last time. This interview is over!"
American: "Thank you Mr. President. This interview has confirmed the suspicions of millions of Americans that you are a weak, indecisive, anti-American leader and nothing more than a consummate, pathological liar without redemption, remorse, or contrition. You are not fit to hold the office of President of the United States. But no matter, America will survive your presidency since after all you are merely a fool. However, America is less likely to survive a multitude of fools, such as those who elected you as their President." (a similar quote was allegedly attributed to Vaclav Klaus, President of the Czech Republic.)
Ladies and gentlemen, President Obama has been interviewed by several journalists, most notably Commentator Bill O'Reilly, but he has never faced an interview by an American citizen in front of the TV cameras, an American that has observed or has suffered the humiliating injustices of the President's polices and radical, un-American ideology. If we were that American conducting that interview, these are some of the questions we would have asked him and the editorial comments we would have made. We have imputed his answers from what he has said as President and from his past, before becoming President. The interview was constructed to reflect reality, American frustration over his actions and constant lying, the direction the country is headed and to throw in a little satire of our own.
© 2014 Ron Ewart — All Rights Reserved
Ron Ewart, a nationally known author and speaker on freedom and property issues and author of his weekly column, "In Defense of Rural America", is the President of the National Association of Rural Landowners, (NARLO) a non-profit corporation headquartered in Washington State and dedicated to restoring, maintaining and defending property rights for urban and rural landowners. Mr. Ewart can be reached by e-mail.